Repentance? Sounds Gross.

I haven't been able to get away from the word. It seems like everything I hear, listen to or talk about leads me back to the art of repenting. I guess it's not really an art. A simple act is more like it. But SIMPLE can be incredibly intimidating. But the more I engage in the act of repentance, the more I see the beauty in it. I'm beginning to understand why Jesus talked about it so much. Why he exclaimed, "REPENT!" and urged us to do so. Because it brings freedom. It shuts down the enemy and his schemes. It brings Glory to God and it is authentic. Repenting is REFRESHING. It says so in Acts 7:10, "Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing my come from the Lord."

First, let me explain what I mean by the "act of repentance." To repent is to stop the way you're going, turn around, and walk the other way. By repenting, I am simply admitting to another person my sin and choosing to walk away from that sin. Shoot. Repenting is easy! Walking away and training my sinful nature (aka my "flesh) to not continue down the path it's used to is the hard part.

I heard it said that if we say Jesus died for our sins, but we don't talk about our sin, then what we're saying is that we don't believe HE DIED FOR US. Woah. What!? But it makes sense. If I believe that he died for my sins and that my slate is wiped clean, why would I hide in shame and try to cover it up? I would be like Adam & Eve in the garden, ashamed and thinking I could hide from God. I am not fooling anyone but myself if I pretend that I have my life together. I am only acting like a self-righteous and arrogant woman that refuses to receive what God has for me. That sounds harsh, but when I am like that, it's ugly.

I want REFRESHING. I want FREEDOM. I want to be AUTHENTIC. I want to draw people to Jesus, not repel them because I'm trying (and failing) to be perfect. When I repent, that is the beginning of me choosing God. I can't ignore the fact that as Christ-followers, we're asked to be obedient and to do this. It's freeing to know that I can and will mess up, and that's OKAY. Because we all do. But you know what, I am fumbling through this, and I am desperate for what God wants to give me. I know that He is good and that what He has for me is good. My prayer is that he would continue to break me. Continue to speak clearly about what parts of my life bear bad fruit (John 15:2) so that I will be fruitful.